Nerd boners stand at attention. Olivia Munn graces the page of GQ this month looking hot enough to have sexual fantasies about, but geeky enough to talk Back to the Future flux capacitors with as well. Meow!
What a way to start a triple digit weather day in the San Fernando Valley! The promo shots of Emmanuelle Chriqui for Entourage are a scorcher. You’ve gotta love a woman whose last name sounds like the primal screams during a rendezvous behind a taco truck on set.
I didn’t think it was possible to do worse than having sex with Sandra Bullock, which I imagine was like doing the deed with the crypt keeper. Next, he graduated to goose stepping with a chick dubbed “Bombshell,” probably because her vagina exploded when you tried to infiltrate its perimeter. But now, Jesse James is having sex with a girl who resembles one of those Scholastic books you got in school that was full of star stickers and word mazes to get to cupcake island. Kat Von D is flat out gross. I wonder if having sex with Kat Von D is more like humping a Banksy stencil or a Shepard Fairey wheat paste.
Here’s one for the ladies and gentlemen who lurk on this blog in search of tasteless quips like:
losing your virginity is messy.
be sure to use a lubricant when trying to enter her bunny.
is it as serious an offense when vampires cross streams as when the Ghostbuster’s do it?
white people.
The terrorists win if I don’t post pictures of beautiful women despite the technology jihad going on around here. Meet Sophie Horn who fashions herself a golfer, presenter and model. It’s like she just picked three random things out of a hat after the Miss America host asked her what she’s into. *Insert putting it in her hole jokes here.
*Disclaimer* Our Kitchen Sink does NOT consider these to be the best nude magazine covers of all time, they’re just examples of famous people taking their clothes off for well respected publications like Esquire and Vanity Fair. If we really had to choose the greatest nude magazine cover it would be the one of a naked Sarah Palin and Condoleezaa Rice on the cover of Asses and Ammo with the catch phrase, “is that a Beretta in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”
Well… the conspiracy theorists can stick this in their pipe and smoke it. After it’s long since been rumored that Zooey Deschanel and Katy Perry were the same person, a photograph has surfaced which shows the two together. Isn’t this how one of the Back to the Future plots goes. But I digress. Zooey looks smokin’ hot and we all know my feelings on Katy Perry. If you’re having trouble telling the two apart, the one on the left with play you old 45’s, and the one one the right will lick your popsicle.
The true measure of just how good looking and sexually appealing a woman is comes down to one test and one test only: would you drink her bath water? Give me Scarlett Johansson’s bath water and I’d have that thing drained faster than the swimming pool at Bushwood Country club. It’s no big deal.
The World Cup has provided a bevy of emotions. Everything from blown calls causing nations to fall to the wayside, to triumphs by countries whose populations are smaller than the jeans dirty hipsters wear in Echo Park. But by far the biggest breakout star of the tournament is none other than Paraguayan hottie, Larissa Riquelme, who has seen her enthusiastic cheering for her home country catapult her into the viral hottie stratosphere. Recently, Riquelme proclaimed that she’d run around naked if Paraguay took home the crown.
Part of the reason I never went into journalism is because you have to report the facts and maintain a very strict level of professionalism when it comes to interviewing subjects. Apparently George Wayne of Vanity Fair tossed out the rule book while interviewing ESPN’s Erin Andrews. Questions broached ranged from shopping for shoes in the tranny section to what she takes when feeling constipated. I shit you not. Double entendre! Read the interview HERE.
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