There’s nothing like South By Southwest. Music bleeding from every wall, forming the ultimate live mixed tape of every musical style that will try, and probably fail, to live up to any sort of commercial expectation. Food- BBQ ribs, pork, brisket, sausage- forming the ultimate gastro mixed tape of authentic American tastes that will try, and probably fail, to keep you out of a shoddy port-o-poddy out back at Stubb’s. Booze- Shiner, Lone Star, Dixie, and whatever other alcoholic combo floats your proverbial boat that will form the ultimate fuel to take in said music and BBQ while trying, and probably failing, to avoid the inevitable hangover, barf session, exhaustion collapse. Throw in the elements of St Patrick’s Day, and the first weekend of the NCAA basketball tournament, and you’ve got a full plate of ingredients that will alternately challenge and enhance one’s enjoyment of all of the action.

Mad props to the organizers of SXSW for developing their website throughout the years to accommodate new technology. I have assembled my ideal schedule on their website, which you can then publish and share with your friends. Add a dash of Twitter and a pinch of Foursquare, and the technology of these social networking methods is actually making the festival more enjoyable as opposed to just creating noise. I freely admit that in putting together this schedule, I am operating in a vacuum, not accounting for three huge factors- the fact that inebriation is not only a possibility but key to survival, geography (I’m not pulling up google maps to see how far Jaime’s is from Beauty Bar), and the NCAAs, where a good upset in the making can derail just about any jaunt across town to see your favorite buzz band. All things being equal, here’s my plan:

Wednesday, March 17

St Patrick’s Day. In Austin. During SXSW. Whoa. Let’s start young and work our way up. My evening begins at Submerged with Kitten, a new band headed by 15 year old rock songstress Chloe Chaidez. I saw her first band when she was about 12 (!) at a middle school in Pasadena as a favor and was amazed even then that this girl’s potential. The talent was raw, to be sure, but then again so was the school’s PA system. If you listen to the tracks on the band’s myspace you can hear that she’s come a long way already. Not sure where the story will end up but the journey is damn intriguing. The ultimate new school to old school transition will then take me to Stubb’s for Sharon Jones & The Dap Kings. Sharon stole an early slot at Bonnaroo a couple years ago, and the combo of hearing some great soul music at my favorite Austin venue is too good to pass up. 90% chance I will be balancing a plate of ribs with a smaller plate of pecan pie on top of a can of Shiner Bock during this performance. From there a few shows interest me- Born Ruffians at The Phoenix, Fanfarlo at the Galaxy Room- but who am I kidding? I’m staying at Stubb’s to see the new Broken Bells collab. Danger Mouse is a dude that just intrigues me. From The Grey Album, you just knew this guy was on to something.

From there, I picture myself stumbling over to Emo’s for another collaboration, Distant Relatives. This one features Nas and Damian Marley. From that point in the evening on, all bets are off- I could equally picture myself eating pizza on 6th Street, going to see Flying Lotus at The Phoenix, or passing out in a puddle of my own dirt and drool. There is no point in utilizing a schedule after midnight.

Thursday, March 18

The first day of the NCAAs. I feel like I’m going to skip any daytime showcases and parties and become a shut-in at my hotel room watching games. Maybe a bar with a decent TV will be my destination. At some point I need to head over to the convention hall for Flatstock (trust me, it’s worth it). By 9:30 I should be ready to return to the band weasel world, and I’ll start with a double-dose of talented black ladies whose names begin with two consonants- Nigerian Nneka at the Day Stage Cafe at 9:30, then to Latitude 30 at 10:30 for VV Brown. From there it’s back to the scene of last night’s crimes at Stubb’s for Band Of Horses, one of those bands I’ve admired for a while but never seen live. Man Man at something called the Billboard Bungalow or Dr Dog at the Austin Convention Center is a distinct possibility, but more likely is one of two must-see bands playing at the festival- The xx at the Mohawk Patio. Their album has been in constant rotation for me recently, but I’ll be curious to see if they can translate the vibe to the live stage.

Friday, March 19

At this point in the week, keeping a schedule has become less of a priority, replaced by mere survival. It’s hard to keep the energy up to scamper all over town to see random baby bands, and in truth the best bet is to park your ass at a particular venue with a strong line up and stay there throughout the night. Stubb’s or La Zona Rosa are always safe bets. If a shot of adrenaline runs through me, I envision seeing some combination of the following shows: Black Joe Lewis & The Honeybears at 8PM, Austin Music Hall; the second must-see band in Austin, Local Natives at 9PM, Galaxy Room; She & Him (their music does little for me, but ohhh, Zooey…) 10PM @ Lustre Pearl; Deer Tick, 11PM @ Red Eyed Fly; The Cool Kids , 11:30PM @ Mohawk Patio; Rye Rye, 12AM @ Beauty Bar. Or the opportunity to see a band called Gay Witch Abortion at the Soho Lounge may prove to be irresistible. This could be my only chance.

Saturday, March 20

To be completely honest, looking at Saturday’s schedule, there’s not much there that will keep me in town. By Saturday I usually get that feeling you have when you’re leaving Las Vegas, the gut-punch reality that you just lost all your money over a weekend you barely remember. The dread isn’t as severe after a long weekend in Austin, but your body is officially offended by all of the intoxicants and fatty meats you have been filling it with. So while my eyes are seeing Matt Pond PA, Major Lazer, No Age etc, my brain is fantasizing about a home cooked meal, a glass of ice water, and my own bed at this point.

Rock on.

Another day, another dollar and another post about Zooey Deschanel. I can’t help myself, and when I can’t think of anything else to write about, my mind turns to thoughts of frolicking with this fair maiden. But let’s get back on track. During filming of (500) Days of Summer, Marc Webb shot this short film/music video that features her and Joesph Gordon-Levitt dancing around to “Why Don’t You Let Me Stay Here.” Stick ‘em up!

There is always a tendency when we hear a new band to make comparisons to their predecessors. “They sound like a cross between Pavement and Prince, with a bit of Bad Brains thrown in for good measure”. The reason for this is obvious- when we hear something new, we feel more comfortable with something familiar to relate it to. This practice is not limited to music; check out discussions about movies (”It’s like ‘Dancing With Wolves’ set in space!”) or sports (”He’s the new Michael Jordan!”) for some examples.

Trying to describe Local Natives’ sound invites a similar practice, but is ultimately as unnecessary as they are something rather original to behold. They rely heavily yet effectively on vocal harmonies throughout the album, a practice not often adopted in the indie rock world. The songs’ percussive signatures stand out. And while I don’t particularly know what they are singing about on most of their songs, they vocal hooks are evident throughout the album. I was surprised to hear a cover song about midway through- Talking Heads’ “Warning Sign”. Cover songs are rarely heard on indie rock albums these days, but it was a nice break from sonic experimentation and gives the listener the comfort of something familiar, at least if you have the Heads’ classic Fear Of Music in your collection.

Overall, Gorilla Manor is excellent on many levels- relaxed yet ambitious, musically accomplished yet not obnoxiously experimental. The best one-two punch is “Airplanes” and “Sun Hands”, where the band’s harmonies converge most effectively. And they seem to be fond of mustaches, always a good thing. 4 stars.

Check out Local Natives here.
Buy Local Natives here.

Here’s their vid for “Airplanes”:

Let me be clear. The sentiment behind the remake of “We Are The World” to benefit makes perfect sense. No doubt the hearts of the organizers and artists involved are in the right place. Of course we all want to see the people of Haiti rebuild their lives, and they need our money and awareness. But from a music standpoint, I need to be honest, if un-PC: “We Are The World 25 For Haiti” is the most ungodly piece of musical dogshit since Kobe Bryant tried to launch a music career (I’m a huge Kobe fan but I couldn’t even get through the first 90 seconds of his song. The record label refused to release it, and that’s really saying something).

I can’t fault the artists, really- if doing what you do for a living can benefit a nation as devastated as Haiti, by all means you should sign up. However, the whole musical experience of the new “We Are The World” is so off-putting that it serves to challenge the altruism of anyone watching it from the moment it starts. First of all, by kicking it off with Justin Bieber, a teen pop artist whose only musical talent proven thusfar is a nice head of hair, you are basically saying to anyone who remembers the original “We Are The World” that their interest in this musical exercise is unnecessary. Later seeing/hearing Tony Bennett and Barbra Streisand contributing verses comes off as an effort to counter the Bieber factor. Uh, one minor problem- there is about 68 years between Bennett and Bieber. So to those of us who grew up watching anything between the Brady Bunch and Seinfeld, are we aced out of the equation!? We WERE “We Are The World”, and we have the faux Michael Jackson glitter gloves and Members Only jackets in the back of our closets to prove it!

When we get to the chorus we see that they decided to leave the original Michael Jackson recording in. Can’t replace MJ, I get it. Again though, if you remember the original WATW, you probably get the sinking feeling watching Jackson that the musical landscape has gone in the shitter since. It’s like watching the NBA All Star Game dunk contest over the weekend having just watched video of the classic Jordan/Dominique duels back in ‘87 & ‘88. Thanks for reminding me that the past is better than the present…

After Michael Jackson, and Streisand and Bennett, our eardrums are assaulted with an artillery round of bad performances from a variety of artists. Enrique, ouch. Wyclef, love what you’re doing for your homeland, but the shrill singing sounds like a bad American Idol audition. Adam Levine, just stop. If you survived all of this without clicking off the video, you are treated to a few seconds of Jamie Foxx impersonating Ray Charles. I was unaware that in addition to the teen demo, the hip-hop demo and the geezer demo, we were also trying to round up the impersonator aficionado demo. I didn’t see Rich Little in the choir. Jamie, your music cred is already pretty iffy, let’s not remind everyone that your strongest artistic achievement was your Oscar winning performance of Charles. Just be Jamie, Jamie.

And just when you think it couldn’t get any worse- AUTOTUNE! Are you fucking kidding me with the Autotune? Until Kanye figured out how to make Autotune an interesting studio technique on 808s & Heartbreaks, it was used to help tune bad singers who couldn’t stay in tune. Now it’s used as a vehicle to allow rappers who can’t sing expand their musical palate. It’s an irritating fad that Jay Z tried to proclaim dead last year but, like a bad case of the clap, won’t go away. If you can’t sing, perhaps you should stand in the back row of the chorus and lipsync like I’m sure Dan Aykroyd did in the original.

An interesting side note about Jay Z here. H.O.V.A. and I appear to be on the same page. He recently stated that he had no interest in remaking the original and suggested a new song be written. I’m with you Jay- I got 99 problems, and the We Are The World remake is one of them. But I digress.

OK it can’t get any worse after the Autotune segment, right? Well how about a bunch of mainstream rappers taking the entire song hostage for about a minute?! If you watch the original, it’s interesting that there is no hip-hop element to the song. Rap was starting to bubble but had yet to reach a mainstream (i.e. middle class/white) audience yet. In fact I would argue that the moment hip-hop went from fad to legit musical movement came between 1985’s WATW and 1986’s Run-DMC/Aerosmith collaboration “Walk This Way”. Music has never been the same since, but by including a cheesy rap bridge in the middle of the new song, you cheapen the influence hip-hop has had on mainstream music for some 25 years. Rap music can convey a lot of emotions, but it doesn’t do earnest very well. This is not a racial thing- check out the Beastie Boys trying (unsuccessfully) to rap about 9/11 and George W Bush on 2004’s To The 5 Boroughs.

I admit, I’m a first class cynic when it comes to tripe like this. Be part of the solution, you may say. Well here’s a proposal that reflects the modern musical landscape and doesn’t feel like a desperate attempt to duplicate an idea that was not particularly effective the first time around. The most satisfying efforts musicians have made to contribute to the crisis in Haiti thusfar have been various methods of charging their fans for music with proceeds going to charities focused on rebuilding the city. The big “Hope For Haiti Now” concert telethon posted all of the performances on itunes with the proceeds going to various charities. Wilco posted two full concerts from their recent tour, asking that fans donate $15 to Oxfam or Doctors Without Borders in exchange for the privilege of downloading the bootlegs. Music For Relief posted a compilation of songs from various artists with similar donation guidelines. They use the honor system in the hopes that everyone who downloads will donate, but even the most ardent advocate for file sharing couldn’t live with themselves if they didn’t contribute something.

I donated to Haiti via all of these causes. Hell, the Music For Relief comp featured artists that I had to immediately delete from my itunes out of fear that their music would contaminate the rest of my collection (looking at you again, Enrique). I would argue that many of the contributors to these download for dollars causes are the audience the record labels lost years ago, people who see no reason to buy music anymore. So I suggest that all of the major labels, itunes, and any other major online music retailer should join forces and dedicate a week where they offer exclusive, quality music for download with all of the proceeds heading to Haiti. Every artist that wants to participate can do so on their own terms, thus avoiding having to see Lil Wayne and Tony Bennett share a recording studio. Artists should be encouraged to release something good- new songs, bootlegs like Wilco, a remix compilation. Whatever- just make it something that your fans will be compelled to buy. Make it a worthwhile deal, something like $.79 per song, and have itunes also create a marketplace for it with a button to click and download the whole virtual boxed set for $99. A monkey or your mother should be able to download the tracks without confusion. Put some promotion behind it and make it clear that these tracks will only be available for a limited time, which will compel people to act now. There will be no harm in utilizing the opportunity for bands to promote something they are proud of- drop your new single, post the best concert of your tour, release the original demos of your greatest hits, showcase the DJ who remixed your hit single- no one will judge you because it will be clear that we are all contributing to a greater cause here. After all, the music business might not be without electricity and sleeping in mud with no food, but it could use a little help too.

If you can stomach it, here’s “We Are The World 25 For Haiti”. Do not drive or operate heavy machinery after viewing.

As Los Angeles is socked in with rain, today seemed like a good day to delve in to Massive Attack’s latest, Heligoland, out today. Certain artists are most conducive to listen to during different times of the year- for instance, Dr Dre’s The Chronic is best enjoyed on a hot summer day, with the top down and a shortie riding shotgun. I suggest Diane Birch’s Bible Belt should be listened to with the leaves turning colors and and a nice warm latte in one’s hand. Throw on Bob Dylan’s Together Through Life while cracking open a Dixie Beer, sparking up the BBQ and a spring baseball game on in the background. But save a cold rainy day for Massive Attack. Hell, the first track off their new album is entitled “Pray For Rain”, appropriately enough. That track features Tunde Adebimpe from TV On The Radio on vocals, while most of the rest of the album features two Massive mainstays, trip-hop queen Martina Topley-Bird and reggae legend Horace Andy. Blur/Gorillaz vocalist Damon Albarn appears on “Saturday Come Slow” and former Mazzy Star frontwoman Hope Sandoval performs on “Paradise Circus”, which may be my favorite track so far. “Babel” buzzes with an analog drum backbeat and guitar soundscapes, while “Splitting The Atom” takes on a trippy Leonard Cohen vibe. Throughout the album, electronic/synthetic sounds are eschewed in favor of traditional instruments for the most part. It’s never really about the lyrics on a Massive Attack album; the vocalists tend to provide color to the band’s distinctive soundscapes. And while it’s safe to say that Massive has developed a formula- create cool, dreamy trip-hop (for lack of a better term), add hipster vocalist, commission abstract artist Tom Hingston to create album artwork, stir, and voila’!- it’s a formula that works. Heligoland is no exception, but this is a good thing. I’m just relieved Heligoland isn’t an amusement park I need to take my kids to.

Buy the deluxe version of Heligoland here. Or if you are of the more visually oriented sort, check out the album’s “Tweatre” (twitter) site here where you can watch accompanying videos. “Paradise City” is compelling and very NSFW (bonus!).

I don’t know much about Mia Doi Todd, but I’m immediately interested in any and all work done by Michel Gondry. Once again Gondry doesn’t disappoint,  this time using masterful color design to achieve his quirky vision.  Aside from the new OK GO video, definitely my favorite video of the year thus far.

(via)

Before I rip last night’s show to shreds, let’s give the Grammys some props. The awards are completely irrelevant (see #1 below), acceptance speeches are as interesting as a 2AM infomercial, but the show producers have figured out over the last few years that the appeal of the show as a TV program are the performances. The Oscars will always have the edge in terms of prestige and the relevance of the awards, but you tune in to the Grammys to hopefully see a performance that people will be talking about at the office the next morning. Somehow about 6 or 7 years ago the Grammys stole all of the pop culture cred back from the MTV awards, an amazing feat in itself.

That being said, the best thing about watching the Grammys is slamming every moment of the show that feels awkward, hokey or lame. Here are twelve thoughts that went through my head watching the show last night.

1. The first, last and best argument for the irrelevance of the Grammys- the fact that I have to list the following:
- Album of the Year is awarded to the performer and the production team of a full album.
- Record of the Year is awarded to the performer and the production team of a single song.
- Song of the Year is awarded to the writer(s)/composer(s) of a single song.
Every year we need to clarify the top awards, because no one knows which is which. Do you hear anyone watching the Oscars say “What is the difference between Best Picture and Best Actor?!”

2. Pity the poor soul who watched the 210 minutes of the show live, without the aid of Tivo. I got through it in about 40 minutes. As our attention spans deteriorate like John Edwards’ moral center, do you think one day the Grammys can be an hour long show consisting exclusively of performances and a Sportscenter-esque crawl at the bottom of the screen, telling us who won? How do we make this happen?

3. Could you imagine buying scalped tickets to the Grammys for like $1,000 apiece, getting all excited at the prospect of sitting 4th row center, and finally getting to your seats- only to be sitting behind Lady Gaga and her Fortress of Solitude headpiece!?

4. It pains me to say this, since she seems like such a sweet, young, unaffected girl, but Taylor Swift’s appeal is a total headscrather. Her songs are as annoying as her ginormous teeth, and her performance with Stevie Nicks was an offkey disaster, mother-daughter karaoke at Back To School night. If she had a slogan, it would be “music for people who don’t like music”.

5. Pink’s performance was perhaps the greatest performance in the history of television of a song that was completely unmemorable. It was like she was performing a rare b-side (if rare b-sides still existed), realized that the song had no hook whatsoever, and decided to disrobe into a nude bodysuit and audition for cirque du soliel to salvage her screen time. Give her credit- she could’ve easily been the odd girl out, lost amongst GaGa’s eccentricity, Taylor Swift’s fresh innocence, and Beyonce’s beauty. But she completely nailed it and put to rest any thoughts (mine included) questioning her existence on the pop culture landscape. BTW I’ll put the over/under of her coming out of the closet and announcing her gay marriage to Meredith Baxter at 4.5 years.

6. Speaking of which, Tre’ Cool should win Men Who Look Like Old Lesbians’ Man Of The Year. I like American Idiot, thought 21st Century Breakdown was underrated, and I enjoy going to a Broadway play now and then. But all three at the same time? Uh, no thanks.

7. The most awkward moment was Ke$ha and Justin Bieber presenting something completely unmemorable on stage together. It was like introducing your little brother to your meth dealer- let’s get this over with quickly.

8. Do you think that Jay Z and Beyonce are in a Tom Cruise-esque marriage arrangement? They don’t seem to have any sort of natural loving chemistry. Maxwell and Roberta Flack seemed more likely to get busy in the limo after the show. It may be a ridiculous allegation, but if you were married to Beyonce, tell me you wouldn’t tongue kiss her cleavage every time she won an award and the camera cut to the two of you. I didn’t see the HOVA even give her a warm handshake, nor did I hear her thank her “wonderful husband for all of his love and support” at any point. Hip hop conspiracy theorists, get to work.

9. Why did they choose to have the best comedy album as part of the live broadcast but none of the rap awards? Best Traditional Polka Album deemed too obscure for air time?

10. What do you think makes a 60 year old Lionel Richie look the exact same now as he did 25 years ago- plastic surgery or goat semen!? Tell me you wouldn’t smear animal spunk all over your face to look as good as he does. If that’s a facelift, I need to reassess my theories of gravity.

11. I went to high school with a dude named Zack Brown. He owes me $100. I will not listen to Zak Brown until that debt is paid.

12. For the last several years, I have remarked that these performances should be available for sale on itunes. Even when albums were still being sold, and there was a potential to “cannibalize sales”, it still seemed like a no brainer. They finally figured it out and are making the performance available on itunes this year. Proceeds to Haiti. Time is ticking, however- as of presstime they only had the Mary J/Andrea Bocelli track available.

Every year there are a couple bands that emerge, seemingly out of nowhere, that get the music blogs all hot and borthered like an un-neutered spaniel in the springtime. Tracks go viral, clumsy diatribes are composed, and all the band can do is ride the wave, make the best album they can, and release it with perfect timing. The cool thing about the internet is the band can truly come from anywhere, it has nothing to do with what record label they’re on, or if alternative radio spun their music incessantly. It’s rare form of good art reaching it’s audience without too many filters or obstructions. The main obstruction in fact is other bands- hard to tell in those early days, based on one or two songs, whether a band has the goods or if their lead singer happened to share a dorm room with someone who writes for Pitchfork now.

It’s early in ‘10, but one of those bands for this year appears to be Local Natives. Perhaps they are on my radar a little strongly because I remember getting tipped to them about 9 months ago and had an early eye on them. I am going to keep the frothing to the other animals in the blogosphere. I will simply mark my appreciation that their first video still maintains some mystery about the band. In marketing bands these days, everyone decides that artists need to open their closets and expose themselves in all their Flipcam glory, but just like you don’t need to see Stephon Marbury chow down on Vaseline, you don’t need to know every gory detail about your favorite new band’s proclivity to eating spicy Cheetos while pissing out of their van. So kudos to LN for making a video that doesn’t reveal much about the band. Mystique is a good thing. Ultimately it comes down to the song, and in this case they appear to have a natural feel for a good, unique hook. This is also a good thing.

So here’s the video, check it out and decide for yourself if you like the song without relying on other opinions (except mine, of course).

We love The Heavy over here. They performed for us a couple months ago in the peaceful confines of our backyard, which was a treat. Last night they performed on Letterman and provided a truly enlightened performance. Dave was so impressed that he asked the boys to play the song again. This appears to be the first time in Late Show history that this has occurred. Even the Times Square tourists in the audience seemed to to dig the band’s retro grooves. It’s a challenge to truly bring the house down on a late night TV show, especially if you are a relatively unknown band taking the stage. Here’s to hoping they don’t stay unknown for much longer. Check ‘em out and for heaven’s sake buy the band’s album!

The Heavy//VIMBY Backyard Session

British duo The Ting Tings performed on Saturday Night Live over the weekend, and while viewers let their quirky brand of funky pop into their living rooms, the band refused to reciprocate by telling us their name. Cute fashionista blonde lead singer can be quoted as singing “they call me Stacey, they call me her, they call me Jane…that’s not my name”, but no further details were released at press time. Repeated contact from Our Kitchen Sink’s headquarters to Ting Ting reps were not returned, but later in the show she implored us to “shut up and let [her] go”. Stay tuned for further developments.