Check out Neil DeGrasse Tyson’s take on what it would be like to die in a black hole. Pretty nuts!

Today, SEEN THE SCENE will focus on the top five movie rants of all time. Why, cause I’m angry, and enjoy the use of expletives in film. There’s nothing like a well timed f*ck to get the blood pumping.

5.  Training Day - Alonzo

“I’m the police, I run shit here!  You just live here!”

“King Kong ain’t got shit on me!”

4. Fight Club - Tyler Durden

“Advertising had us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate, so we can buy shit we don’t need.  We’re the middle children of history men, with no purpose or place.  We have no great war.  No Great Depression.  Our great war is a spiritual war.  Our Great Depression is our lives.”

Browsing through Last Nights Party and found this photo. Girl, whoever you are, thanks for reppin’ the VIMBY top.
Photo source: lastnightsparty.com

Before I post my review of U2’s brilliant new No Line On The Horizon which comes out Tuesday, I was thinking about their missteps, few as they may be. For a band that has been around for an astounding 30+ years, U2’s batting average is stellar- almost every album is great, with a few that are amongst the greatest rock albums of all time and a few that you would describe as merely good. By comparison, within the first 29 years of The Rolling Stones’ recording career, they had already delivered such stinkers as Their Satanic Majesty’s Request, Black & Blue and, in all of their 80’s induced day glow glory, Dirty Work. Memories of that album make me buke (burp/puke) in my throat a little. By contrast, here are the top 5 creative low points in U2’s career:

5. “Helter Skelter”
U2 was widely derided for the self-induced grandiosity of their post-Joshua Treeconcert film, Rattle And Hum. For good reason- while it was a cool and interestingly filmed look at a band at their peak, the band seemed to take themselves a little too seriously and the critics let them know it. The best example of this was “Helter Skelter”, performed live on tour with Bono introducing the song as “This is a song Charles Manson stole from the Beatles; we’re stealing it back!” Um, fellas, who said you were the heir apparent to the fab four?!

4. The Sound At The End Of Zooropa
Zooropa is an underrated U2 album. It started as an EP to keep their fans satiated while the band spanned the globe on their highly successful Zoo TV tour, but apparently the ideas kept on coming and the band put it out as a full length. I bought the album (cassette, actually) while backpacking through Europe that Summer, so there will always be a personal nostalgia attached to this release for me. It was the soundtrack to many a Eurorail journey that summer, and on more than one occasion I snoozed to the last few songs on the album. At the end of “The Wanderer”, for some completely unknown reason, there is a blaring car alarm-sounding sound that is unnecessary, obnoxious, and unwelcome when sleeping on a train. Here’s the track on its own, with out the sonic mischief. Would it have been so hard to end the album this way!?!:

3. Tracks 7-10 on How To Dismantle An Atomic Bomb
Unlike most U2 releases, How To Dismantle An Atomic Bomb is not a dramatic departure from the album that preceded it All That You Can’t Leave Behind. It was well received, has a few standout tracks, but ultimately feels like a safe sequel to ATYCLB. There is little to no reason to listen to the songs between “All Because Of You” and “Yahweh”. Here’s the video for “Crumbs From Your Table”. Yawnariffic.

2. The To Be Released “Spider Man-The Musical”
I know few things about this project, but apparently the boys are composing the music to “Spider Man- The Musical”. This sounds like one of those ridiculous projects that receives some press early on but ultimately never comes to fruition. At the height of “Borat” fame, it was announced Sacha Baron Cohen was going to do a sequel. However, once the character had received worldwide recognition, it would be impossible to pull off the pranks in the first film. Ultimately SBC announced he would not be doing “Borat II: Electric Boogaloo”, and “Spider Man-The Musical” has that “Hitler On Ice” quality that makes it a headscratcher. If it does come out I figure I should reserve a spot on this list for it. Here’s Julie Taymor talking about it:

1. “Discotheque”
Like Zooropa, 1997’s Pop is slightly underrated. Not the band’s best work, but some of the sonic explorations work and the album has its moments. Lead track and first single “Discotheque” is not one of them, however. Unarguably the worst recording in the band’s career, it doomed the album and its subsequent tour from the get-go. Sample nauseating lyric:

You Know You’re Chewing Bubblegum
You Know What It Is But You Still Want Some
You Just Can’t Get Enough
Of That Lovie Dovie Stuff

Um, say what!?  The first single on U2’s new album “Get On Your Boots” has received mixed reviews.  I think this is because the “sexy boots” lyric reminds fans of “Discotheque”’s inherent cheesyness.  “Boots” might not be U2 at their best, but c’mon, it’s better than seeing the band dress up like the Village People. The video is so cheesy, watching it makes my lactose intolerance act up and I need to excuse myself.

Go here for more U2 info.

Michelle Obama’s official White House portrait (just released):

Classy is the new hot.

Today’s SEEN THE SCENE comes from the Coen brother’s O Brother Where Art Thou. I have a hard time choosing my favorite Coen brother’s film, but this is definitely a classic scene.

A drug-suggestive billboard promoting the musical “Xanadu” currently on stage in Chicago has sparked criticism from some neighbors and parents whose kids attend an elementary school across the street.

Personally, I think that the ectasy reference is a little too posh and “clubby” for such a working class place as Chicago. Consider these alternatives:

“It’s like eating two slices of deep dish, then drinking a sixer of Old Style tall boys.” Or even better: “It’s like Vienna beef.”

“It’s like getting gooned in the alley in Rogers Park, but getting away with your wallet and dignity.”

“It’s like sitting between two buxom blondes wearing too tight t-shirts at Wrigley Field.”

via: chicagotribune

On the first full day of NFL free agency, the Washington Redskins landed the top dog. They’ve agreed to terms with former Tennessee Titan DT Albert Haynesworth. The contract is 7 years, and a whopping $100 million, with an NFL record $41 million in guarantees. Damn, some days I wish I was born big like a Mack Truck so I could stack some league money.

In other news, the Cleveland Browns have agreed to trade disgruntled TE Kellen Winslow to Tampa Bay for undisclosed draft picks. I wonder how the “soldier” feels about his change of scenery. Let’s all hope his days of doing motorcycle donuts are over.

This sounds like a wonderful idea. People sleep on Eddie Murphy, but he’s a funny dude with plenty of acting chops. He’s just hit a few road bump (cough cough Norbit) along the way.

Murphy will play Pryor in an upcoming biopic entitled Richard Pryor: Is It Something I Said?

Another one bites the dust. Top models are getting turned into wifey’s faster than aging NFL superstars are getting cut.

Brazilian model Gisele Bundchen married National Football League star Tom Brady Thursday in an “intimate” sunset ceremony, US Weekly magazine reported on its Web site. The couple wed at a Catholic church in Santa Monica, California, in front of mostly immediate family members, the entertainment magazine reported.

Via:  Yuhmm.Com